# The bastardrc from:
# http://bonanomi.com/luke/bastard/
# A .bashrc for BOFHs, with all the thoughtful administrative features that the FSF forgot 
# to add to BASH and that you forgot to mention to your boss.
# 
# Currently Featuring:
# * remapped kill signals
# * process management
# * interactive mail forging

# Coming Soon!
# * Printer management
# * Hotkeys

###################
# BASH Functions 
##################

function named_kill
{
    if [[ $1 == '-Godfather' ]]
	then
	kill -9 $2
	# I admit it. I didn't do the horse-head thing.
	# I'll get to it soon.
    fi

    if [[ $1 == '-shotgun' ]]
	then
	
	for proc in $(ps -aux | awk '/[0-9]/ { print $2}' | grep "^$2")
	  do
	  kill -9 $proc
	done
    fi

    if [[ $1 == '-cia' ]]
	then
	kill -4 $2
	cia="grassy knoll"      # (ed. note: Hrmm... should get this into the 
    fi                          # application's core dump instead of system core)
   
    if [[ $1 == '-driveby' ]]   # Caveat: You must know the beginning of the PID
	then
	for proc in $(ps -aux | awk '/[0-9]/ { print $2}')
	  do
	  if [[ $proc == $2 ]]
	      then
	      kill -9 $old_proc
	      kill -9 $proc
	  fi
	  
	  if [[ $old_proc == $2 ]]
	      then
	      echo kill -9 $proc
	  fi
	  old_proc=$proc
	done
    fi
}

###########################################################
# Man, I hate IRC... but the metaphors are awfully handy.
#########################################################

function kick 
{ 
	shell=$(tr ":" "\t" < /etc/passwd | grep "$1" | cut -f 7) 
	su -c "fuser -k $shell" $1
}

function kick-ban
{
	shell=$(tr ":" "\t" < /etc/passwd | grep "$1" | cut -f 7);
	su -c "fuser -k $shell" $1
	chmod -R ugo-rwx ~$1
}

##############
# Life mirrors 
# Great Cinema 
##############

function matrix
{
	tty_assignment=$(finger $1 | awk '/on/ { print $9}')
	echo "The Matrix Has You... \n\n" > /dev/$tty_assignment
	cat /dev/core > /dev/$tty_assignment
}

#####################################################################
# renice: kill -9 other people's jobs until yours is running to spec. 
# note: this will try not to disturb system processes.                    
#####################################################################
function renice  
{ 
	i=0; 
	pri=$(echo 55 | tr -d "+-"); 
	until (($i > $pri)); 
	do 
		kill -9 $(ps -aux | awk '!/^["root", "daemon"]/ { print $2 }' | grep [0-9] | head -1); 
		let i=$i+1; 
	done; 
}

function kazaa_hunter
{
    # kazaa_hunter Domain Administrator-Name Administrator-Password

    ping=$({ echo "GET /index.html" >&0; cat; } <>/dev/tcp/192.168.0.7/80 | head -3 | tail -1)

    if [ -n $(echo $ping | awk '/KaZaA/ { print $0}') ]
        then
        echo "Filesharing BASTARD!"
        smbclient //$1/c$ $3 -U $1/$2 -c 'cd "/Program Files/Kazaa/"; rename Top Search.dll Rock.kpl;';
    fi
}

function edit_host_file
{
    smbclient //$1/c$ $3 -U $1/$2 -c 'cd "/WINNT/system32/drivers/etc"; prompt; get hosts';

    count=$(wc -l ./hosts | awk '{ print $1}')
    i=0; while (($i < $count));
      do
          line=$(head -$i ./hosts | tail -1);
          echo $line; let i=$i+1;
          echo "Edit this line? y/n";
          read edit;

          if [[ $edit = "n" ]]
              then
              echo $line >> TEST_THIS_FILE;
              else
              echo "New Entry, ended with ^d"; cat >> new_hosts;
          fi
    done

    echo "New entry? y/n";
    read new;

    while [[ $new = "y" ]]
    do
      echo "New Entry, ended with ^d"; cat >> new_hosts;
      echo -e "\nNew entry? y/n";
      read new;
    done

    smbclient //$1/c$ $3 -U $1/$2 -c 'cd "/WINNT/system32/drivers/etc"; prompt; put hosts';
}

#################
# BASH Aliases
################# 

##################################
# forge: interactive mail forgery
##################################
alias forge='
echo Mail To:; read TO;
echo Mail From:; read FROM;
cat | su -c "mail $TO $FROM"
'

# simple aliases
#

alias kill='named_kill'
alias matrix='matrix $1'

alias rm='rm -f'
alias rmdir='rm -rf'